20 July 2007

The Spurs Years

Another funny article from the Arsenal fan, Richard Osley in the Camden New Journal on 19 July 2007.

Hey you. Lucky reader. We have a sneak preview of this summer’s biggest book release: THE SPURS YEARS - Exclusive extracts from the Martin Jol diaries. . .

Monday June 25, 2007
I’ve just heard that Thierry Henry is to play in Barcelona next season. Wonderful news. Every time we play against him, he makes us look silly. Hang on a minute, he didn’t play for Arsenal against us last season and we still looked silly. Must think up another excuse for that 3-0 defeat.

Thursday June 28, 2007
Today I beat all the good teams, like West Ham, to sign Darren Bent. Everybody wished for him – so well done me. The fans will be very happy, yes? I saw him score some goals last year on the television and Sven Eriksson said he was good, so he must be good. I wonder if he is as good as RK, JD, SB and MIDO. It means I can play JD as a substitute again. I told Chris Hughton that we have the chance for DB to play in Tottenham this year. He raised his eyebrows. He does that when he is happy.

Friday June 29, 2007
Chris found out about how much we paid for Bent. He wasn’t very happy. He said I should stop fooling around.

Thursday July 5, 2007
Jermain Defoe (JD) told me he wants to play in Tottenham this season and is not worried that I have won Bent. This will be a funny joke. It’s a great practical joke. I will tell him he has a chance of playing and then get him to sit on the bench next to Danny Murphy. Chris made a joke that JD should be in the first team. He is a funny guy.

Thursday July 12, 2007
Went to do a voiceover for a Grolsch advert.

Tuesday July 17, 2007
I want to sign Shaun Wright-Phillips. He is the size of a smurf right? Wouldn’t it be funny to have a whole team of smurfs. I have already collected JD and Robbie and Aaron Lennon.

Wednesday July 18, 2007
Arjen Robben is going to leave Chelsea to go to Real Madrid. It means I might not be able to sign SWP if Jose wants to keep a winger. It’s a shame. I wanted another player who looks good in an average team but can’t play for a Champions League team.The more average players the better. It’s the only way I can achieve my greatest dream of winning the UEFA Cup.

Till later, live long & prosper.

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